(I copied this from a friend's blog. Thought it was pretty funny!)
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NASCAR 6.0, NFL 5.1 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed, Desperate..
DEAR DESPERATE,
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0-program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck!
- Tech Support
(I have to say, even though this is a hillarious post, I think my husband is pretty darn amazing and wouldn't rate him a 1.0 ever! I definitely got the highest upgrade possible...hehe. I love you honey! Ok, sorry for mush. Oh and a wonderful mother-in-law too! Love you Mom!)
Silent Auction
11 months ago
2 comments:
Sometimes Husband 1.0 throws around some viruses and glitches, but overall, it's pretty awesome! :)
This is so funny! As the one of the origional programers of the Ryan model I can guarantee that we used only the top humor, responsibility, loyalty, intelligence and hotness programs. We did not give him a model number because we know that Heavenly Father (The lead programmer) gave him everything he might need throughout eternity to adapt and learn. I'm blessed that I married one of these models also.
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