Why do we blog?

To answer my own question, when I first started blogging it was for many reasons.

The first being several of you are bloggers and I love reading your posts and looking at pictures of your cute family. I love to stay-in-touch with friends and family, as most of you are aware. If you'd ask my husband, he would say that's 99% of what's always on my mind. I am constantly wondering how my friends and family are doing. I can't stand not knowing if everyone is ok. Life gets busy sometimes and we all have our own families, but I love hearing from you and being able to check in whenever I want to. So thank you for sharing your lives with us! I really do love you all!

The second reason was because I used to write in my journal all the time. I like writing about things or maybe it's just that I love to talk. ;) But for some reason I "couldn't find time" when I had kids to write in my journal all that much, and thought maybe I "could find time" to blog. haha! (Now I am finding way too much time for blogging!)

The last reason was because a few of you wanted me to start a blog, and I kept putting it off. Why? I don't know. Maybe because I knew I would become utterly addicted! But to those that kept saying I should, thank you! However, whatever the motive for first starting this blog, it worked. I get to stay in touch better with all of you! And I am keeping a record of my family and our lives, which I have always wanted to do! Plus the added bonus that it is REALLY fun!!!

All those reasons I listed above is why I started a blog, and they are still the reasons why I blog today. Yet, somewhere along the way something else has become important, and I don't know why! BUT it has really started to bug me....and that's comments. Why comments? Why do we all want a comment?!

So I had to think....am I an insecure Mormon mommy of two, who blog-brags or who needs affirmation? I never thought I was or put myself in that category, because I always question my intentions before posting anything...thinking or maybe justifying, "it's journaling-family history," or "for grandma and grandpa to know what we have been up to and see pictures of the kids..." blah blah blah.

So I kept telling myself who cares if no one comments! I love life and I am secure in who I am. But then why, after several days go by after posting something fun (in this case it was my little girl turning one). I thought there would probably be many comments, only to discover that just one person had left a comment (thanks Kara) and I was sadly disappointed! But why?? (Right then that was my first clue about my self-worth...letting it hang on comments). How pathetic. I need a life. lol.

After talking with a good friend of mine the other day she also expressed similar feelings. So I decided to try and write my feelings about this, because I know I am not alone. I don't know if that's a relief knowing that others feel the same way or if I would rather be the only one. And I don't know yet if I will post this... right now I am just writing for my own sake. I am a complete scatter-brain sometimes; no wonder my husband is often times bewildered by my actions. Writing thoughts out helps me to make better sense of them. Yet, maybe I will post this because maybe, just maybe, there are a few you that might be feeling or have felt this way...(but unlike me, you are smart enough not to express yourself and get an angry mob after you!) And those that don't feel this way or never have... good for you! You must be either new to the blogging world or you really are just that secure! :)

So remember these are just my feelings, I don't want anyone being offended by this, or worried that I have indeed reached insanity. I am OK...really. :) And I definitely don't want people to hate me, so please take all this with a grain of salt! I am usually not this bold in front of people, at least I don't think I am...Maybe with my close family and friends who understand and know me well. But usually I just bite my tongue and don't say anything, so I am a little surprised at myself for doing this. It's like an adrenaline rush! (It's all the football that's been going on at our house, seriously!) You know what they say about getting older...you tend to hold back less and want to voice your opinion more. Yikes! (That could be scary!) That should warn me right there to stop and bite my tongue. hehe...I never learn.

I am not sure who invented blogging, but I kind of wonder if it was some amazing stay at home mom of two sets of twins, who needed more ways to express herself other than "goo-goo’s, and ga-ga’s", to an audience older than two. And blogging has definitely become the latest fashion with internet surfing to express oneself.

By writing this, I feel like I am breeching some unwritten rule in the blogging world, that almost everyone thinks about, but few people actually talk about. (Please don't egg my house...it was just painted. I would prefer toliet paper...lol. thanks.) Blogging has become quite the thing to do, everyone surfing around excessively viewing and commenting on everyone else's blogs…all of us telling each other how cute and creative we all are, with all the "aaah's and oooh's" which makes us feel important and inadequate all in the same moment... Doesn't that sound about right? Is it such a bad thing to want some validation then? No I think not. Blogging has become so widespread among stay at home moms. We all want and NEED that adult conversation and what a better way to get that then sharing our lives with each other through our blogs. And then getting feedback through comments...right?? A friend of ours recently wrote on her blog, (and I hope she doesn't mind me quoting her),... "I know, I know. It's been forever right? But I often wonder if anyone actually reads this...maybe I just need some confirmation that the whole blog thing isn't a narcissistic attempt at proving my life has substance..." Amen to that.

Below is a picture I found and thought... that's it! Who is the next...

After reading this post you are probably thinking something like, "ok I thought she was weird, now I know she is weird," "she is going crazy...poor thing" or "she has fallen off her rocker"...haha. If there is one thing I am good at, it is laughing at myself. The fact is: I am having issues. Blogging issues. Time for me to have a hiatus.

(If I haven't made you feel guilty into commenting yet, then this poor little puppy ought to work... haha! jk.) Please don't feel bad if you don't want to leave a comment. I can see it now... everyone leaving a comment because you don't want to hurt my feelings or no one leaving a comment because you are too scared to! (I am pathetic, but not that pathetic!)